Ten days below

The previous 10 days I have been creating, however I have only completed one piece other than my knitted beanies in between paintings. I wasn't sure wether to post anything as I had a plan to post completed pieces only and try to get myself to finish something each day. However I am creating every day and the difference is in being creative and healing through my creativity and art rather than producing finished works everyday. Hopefully by the end of the year I have a completed series? I would really like to have an exhibition.

Below are 10 photos of  the different pieces I am working on at the moment. The 1st one below is a cross that an old friend of mine made me for my 21st birthday and has since been carried from house to house, eaten out by termites, fired, drenched in storms, dried in drought and carried once again to this home. I have cleaned it and now revived it by wrapping it in wool and it now has a prideful place to remind my of my faith inside the house. It has always been outside the house and now I've decided to bring it inthe home. As my faith is an important part of my whole being and I believe my creativity is a gift form God, it is important for me to have an object that signifies Jesus dying on the cross for me to have life. Don't worry you won't be reading sermons here, hopefully just seeing painting and drawings more often.

my mani inspired installation

Wool bound wooden cross

from white to black. Primed canvas ready to sand

building up the layers

My largest painting at the moment, white on white.

one of my works in process

works in progress

bits of paint

Gesso canvasing in process

Dragon Sketech

I am in the prcess of illustrations and this is the 1st sketch I did in finding my dragon for a kids book I am working on for a friend.

Tea totler

Didg

It isn't every day you are joined for a cup of tea with a winged friend such as Didge, Casper and Erin's wee feathered friend. I am delighted with creative visits from friends, however I have discovered 'the drop' in visitor isn't everyones cup of tea at times.

Anxiety visits for longer than an expected cup of tea time when calling and doesn't know when to leave. I was anxious when Casper first asked if I wanted Didge on my shoulder, I cringed in fear as I have had crazy bird experiences as I happen to be the one they shit on, bite and attack out of everyone. I still have a sore spot on the top of my head when a bird attacked me in the middle of the ocean diving off Bird Island with old friends and one of my heroes. A sea bird dive bombed into my head, gashing blood into a shark infested water.. Anyway, my anxiety dissipated when I caved into Caspers re-assurance, thankfully Didge was a softie and his bites are more affectionate nibbles and he was polite enough to wait for Caspers shoulder to poo.

A differing anxiety that lurks carbon black in my house is the lingering anxiety that make you want to hide in a corner of the house and zone out from life, avoiding the dealings of even the simplest of tasks. A phone call interrupting the dark silence, a friend dropping in to say hello and use the phone, another friend later dropping in to give me a box of avocados, mandarins, rocket and eggs form her farm an adorable welcome in a usually open armed joy, however today I was eye strained, tear flooding breathless dehydrated. foul stenched mood not wanting company. These days are when I feel like the universe is making sure I don't sit in the mud and dry up, though the mud has stuck to my skin and cracked, I try to wade forth out of the blackness and into the browns.

I never realised unoraganised chaos disturbed some people. It is now that I see them effected, like my partner is, by 'the drop in' which I didn't even know had a term til' now and bringing me to this reflection.  I am one who used to love drop ins' and would drop in my self everywhere. I now see its adverse affects and yet I don't know how to change something I do myself.

Weeding Healing

Dougal and Tilly 'gardening feng shui'

Smoochy Staffies having a grande ol' time helping my Folks, Danny and I with weeding the garden. Dogs certainly add an extra element to gardening and any aspect of life.

I didn't get to draw today as it is a blessed opportunity when my folks come down to visit and to also have willing hands to help us create our garden ~ well clear oour garden to then create a garden. We are now three tenths into clearing our property of weeds and I can't wait to get to the landscaping and planting stage that is for sure. Though for now I am happy to do the weeding and composting pre-planting. I think I will get a few million worms as my first pets other than our dog Tilly. I need to get a lot of scraps and weeds composted and what betteer way to get it turned into compost than a massive party of worms! I feel nurtured form my folks visiting today and all of us getting in the garden, eating a healthy home made lunch and spending a day chatting, laughing and most of all watching Dougal and Tilly play, run, speak and pant around and around and around.

Muscles stretched, hands tainted with a rich dark soil and the spirit nurtured through time with loved ones.
A slice of creativity amongst the weeds, work became play today

Wealthy in Friendship

Genevieve of UnSunk Funk

Beautiful people are worth more than gold or any other glorified precious possession of wealth as weighted by many in our society. I am extremely rich in friends and I believe I am alive today because of the love, support, nurturing and prayer of the people that are in my life.

I have started working for a fellow artist and amazing woman who inspires me to create and be me in everything I do, wear, create and am active in. To celebrate my body and character and not be hard on myself which I have become increasingly low on self esteem of late since gaining weight again. Thankfully beautiful people see beautiful people such as Genevieve I photographed here whilst imaging her creative textiles. Time here alongside her retro funky lederhosen wearing body and intricate dada inspired mind I always leave with a recharged soul and strength to my esteem.

Here I am, fattyboombalada enriched with beautiful friends

Friend Sketch

I am still a scribbler in learning....

Portraits are obviously not my forte'

Inspired StitchScapes

Hand Knitted Extreme Nanna Sports 'Dreanies'

My creative day today was as Photographer for Genevieve of UnSunk Funk of Bunbury who is 100% Individualistic. My knitted beanies, dreanies and prints of paintings sell through here where creativity is a buzz in this eclectic gallery. While Genevieve sews funky dresses out of vinatge materials, doilies and other beautiful recycled fabrics her gallery is brimming with local paintings, textiles, sculptures, prints and motley crue of local design.

This place for me is a place I can be myself completely, a fellow artist who inspires me to just create no matter what I think it looks like or feels like. A calming place where I am always re-inspired to create and play with my mediums. This place is a work in progress of its own right as it is continually evolving and draws in a community of people who come to buy, create, inspire, support, play, work or just sit and soak in the art.

Friendships are like a carefully knitted textile piece, stitches too loose or too tight can be forgiveable while a slipped stitch need s to be picked up and carried through...

LOVE LOVE

My home made Quiche made with love... Sappy I know. Tasty treat of creative cooking to enjoy with my love. A week agonised by emotional stress and this journey of healing in which at times I can hardly muster an art sesh of any sorts, so my art this day is a quiche...
LOVE LOVE

Breathing

Breathe          Capturing inspiration in the salty air while my partner and dog run 

                 up and down the beach  is a time of creative imaginings. 

Walk             Painting ideas come to mind in this SeaScape and the relaxing

                 breathe of re-aligning myself with composition of a picture gets my 

Run              veins jigging again to return to play in my studio.

                 I thank my friend Manida here as she inspired me by her actions
Play             to get  outside and create.

Extreme Nanna Sports

Knitting 'Dreanies' with possum fur wool form New Zealand (top blue and orange) and with Alpaca wool (the bottom three). These I am thinking of undoing though and re-knitting as these are the first attempts at using a knitting loom which is quicker, however the sizes are small and I do not know any elven people of that sizing. Yet there is the time wasting, this week has been a kafaffle of time, issues and debates of how time should be used with self, partner, family and friends. How time seeps away through a drain in the vortex of my procrastination and phaffing about avoiding my true reflections of painting. So i will leave these dreanies be for a while while I phaf in my head as to what to do with them and go paint.....

Knitting sports, not just for the old nanna

Drained Pained

This is a journal entry I actually did a while ago in my Furry Red Journal and want to include as a point of reflection. I am spending today knitting and dreamscaping some paintings and not quite ready to share all my drawings and works as I thought I would be right now. It has been a long slow tiring week dealing with a 12 year debacle.

This is a quick sketch I did of Danny as we coffee together in Busselton. I wanted to include it as sometimes he can really annoy me as any friend, partner or family member can. However he is someone who has helped me through some of the hardest experiences and helps me to heal in a more mature and nurturing journey rather than the violent way I used to try and deal with the pain, hurt.. life. This man is my ink to my drawing, paint to my painting, an inspirational pixie that flames my energy. Without him I would not of made it through this week.


The tiny sketch in the space that looks like Danny is looking at, is a small study of my dog Tilly's eye while she was asleep. It is like a drop of peace in the sky of my page. A reminder to sleep and relax when all you want to do is light up a cigarette and smoke your worries away when in actual fact that doesn't happen, it just takes another smelly few minutes of procrastinaton and health, slowing the journey a little. A quick nana nap or meditative knitting spurt is far healthier and I smell like orang blossom rather than porty tobacco. 

Drained for a fresh drawing, 
Pained to include today,
Stumbling through the thick mud

My Furry Red Journal

I am out of sorts and imaginings today as I want to curl up into the zen like dreaming position my puppy Tilly does as I drew her asleep. To withdraw from the world, to leave the world, to not have to fight anymore, to not have to write anymore, to not have to speak to anyone anymore, to not have to look after myself or anyone else anymore, to not have to wear the mask of 'pretty good' as I comment to the every day question of 'how are you'. 'How are you' I'd love to just turn around and say 'fucken sheit actually, wanna jump in my body and see what life is really like for me, want to experience the pain that shoots through my body every fucken minute of the every fucken second of every fucken molecule that pounds brick particles around my stream of spirit, body and all being, wanna see the imagery i have experienced of raw abuse and brutality?! Yes, How the fuck are you?' Good thanks, bit overcast, have a good day then.

I must apologise for my language and anger, a life trying to live a non violent existance yet is it really possible when you want to just carve your own body into pieces. Don't worry I am stable and will not harm myself as I once did in my temperamental gothic days. I just think about it, the imaginings are brutal enough for now and well that is what this blog is, my healing place other than my journal. I did say this was going to be raw and I've decided I will not hold back either. Well that is a lie just there, I am not going to be red raw, just a purple raw! Otherwise you will want to send the white coats in and that won't help me. That will just numb me, shut me up. Sedate me. No, here I am , unable to draw or paint, just stare at my red furry journal and dream about drawing and not being in pain, hurt, wanting to escape. I must escape  into drawing, I will try to draw, yes, please come back later and see what I have created today, I will try to draw in my furry red journal. After all it is an inviting furry red journal, wanting to taste the ink from my pens, devouring up and displaying my handiwork pumped from my veins of expression.

Lawyer interupts again, deal with it

Tilly DreamScape 1

This drawing is of my puppy Tilly, I want to sleep all cosey, not a care in the world, a scape of imagination

Compost piece

Previous warning of the bad with the good is this piece I drew while on the phone to my psychologist this morning. It is an ugly hour of scribbling while trying to be open and listening with my psychologist yet not wanting to be present anymore. The question arises of, 'quick don't include it' and go do a 'real' drawing that someone might want to actually look at as I sure don't.

However I learnt from a wise man that you need compost with the rain and sun for beautiful plants to grow, in otherwords all my crap and muddy dwelling stuff is part of the whole process, so here it is, I'm not hiding it under the carpet. i am hoping now tho to go and do some 'real' drawing that I enjoy or hopefully get the paint on the canvas rather than just look at it dreamscaping a painting on it.

I will use depression and anger and sense of hopelessness as fuel for art, where hopefully the compost will turn shabby seeds into beautiful plants

Sketch one

Sally and Dave converse over a pot of peppermint tea at Cafe 140


Whilst having a cuppa with two friends I decided I just had to get over myself and my fear of 'can't draw' and scribble away. 'Can't draw' you say, looks like a drawing to me. Yes it is a drawing, however if you saw these two friends in real life it is not a picture perfect representation of them. Ahh yes logical brain intercepts , I know I know it doesn't have to be ,that is what photos are for, yet my perfectionist streak of how things should be done, percieved and created are at war with my inner child and freedom to expressively draw without control form the dark abyss of my procrastinating fearful mind. 

I immerse into the seaweed & enjoy the cleansing of it's prickly touch. 

Prolonging my inner child

Here starteth my first blog and my first smashing of fear as I tip-toe into the realm of this cyberscape and relinquish my thirst for creativity and achieving a renewal in my desire for artscaping. This blog 'DreamScapes' is my journey through the daily trampling through the seaweed and hopefully out into the clear water of the oceanscape which is my life.

'Scapes' you may wonder as to my words throughout my journey. I love to dream, draw, write and paint LandSCAPES, SeaSCAPES and all sorts of scapes that are apart of my whole soul. It will be a raw canvas of my self and I warn may have dramatic epilogues of anger, fear, joy, love, peace and all the usual meanderings of a temperamental artist trying to breathe, heal and grow from the journey so far and into a continous creative, healing and energized life. It may also have completely unrealistic dreams, aspirations and dead boring scribbles, however I welcome you to be apart of my journey. As it is through the walking alongside friends, sisters, brothers and my God that I am able to keep journeying.

I hope to write, draw, paint and create something new each day, exploring and practicing my arts. For now I will be focusing on a 12 week journey as I endeavour a few goals ahead of me in timing for my 30th Birthday.

the art of the moment
dreamscaping